Stinky like a circus monkey

Why is it that such grand things are always expected out of first times? If your first kiss isn’t with the perfect amount of sensitivity and reserved passion (read: enough with the tongue Romeo) are you forever a bad kisser? If the first sexual experience with a new partner doesn’t resemble an unrealistic scene from any Lifetime movie are you forever labeled a two-pump-chump? If one’s first blog entry is more mind-numbing than a nascar race with Creed playing in the background will they all be? Hell if I know. I hope not. Unfortunately I’m the guy who always tried to cop a feel during the first kiss and thought that a 69 and a pearl necklace were fair game the first time in the backseat sooo…. Don’t hold your breath for inspiration on my first blog entry.

As Calvin mentioned, this weekend was the first ride on my new Kona Stinky and I did so with mixed emotions. Part of me was stoked to finally be able to do some new stuff while the other, more realistic, part of me was scared that I no longer had a good excuse not to. Besides, if you climb higher than your friends simply by buying a taller ladder have you really accomplished anything? Well, climb figuratively I did. I was able to hit a few new lines that were out of my range on the Slayer that I usually ride. Climb literally I did not. The Stinky is heavier than Oprah’s ass in a pair of lead undies but then I don’t plan to don lycra and check my heart rate anytime soon. And by “anytime soon” I mean never. At any rate, I’m damn glad that I’ve got the Kona around now. I have no plans to “huck” or “go big” but hopefully this bike will allow some progression in my riding and be the push I need to build bigger stuff on my own property. Keep a heads up here for pics of that, future rides, and hopefully better posts.

Go ride your bike.


1 comment:

kevin said...

funny stuff mofo